Love Problems

What to do today..

I have run out of plans for the day
I’m reduced to eating pickles and listening to Buffy. I say listening because it’s just on in the background.
I miss Roy. It’s getting worse. The achey feeling I’ve been suppressing and ignoring the last however many days keeps bubbling up for no reason.
The horrible wishes are doing the same. It’s the weirdest mood swings I’ve ever experienced
“i miss you so much… I hope she cheats on you and you’re left heartbroken in a pool of your own tears because it’s what you deserve”
Or
“i want to slap you in the face with a giant rotting fish and then pour a box of spiders over you’re head…. Why won’t you talk to me”

I think I’ve lost the plot. He kept me sane, and now his absence is leaving me wrong and twisted.
I wanna be someone else

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