Life Problems

April Goodbyes and Sleepovers

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https://starsandatlas.wordpress.com/

Hey guys.
Come and sit by the fire.
What?
What do you mean ‘it’s too hot for a fire?’
I told you to sit the fuck down so do it.

Okay so Carl is gone.
It’s been a long three days.
It was so busy and tiring. But I’ve had a nap and cheese now.
I bought a plain cake on Friday,  took it to the town over to stay with Nat. Decorated it while she worked. We covered it in moustaches. Un hind sight I should have taken a better picture to show you all but.. I forgot. So you get what you get..
There was a moustache in that gap by 10 am. Just so you understand how to read it..

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Now I spent ages decorating this cake.
And in all honesty I didn’t think he would care much about it. It’s a cake.
So I wasn’t really that suprised or hurt that he didn’t seem to want it.
However. The thing that bothered me was that he was so unwilling to have any of it.
I think he was genuinely worried i’d drugged it. He was laughing but it dwindled to a kind of awkward “oh god you have haven’t you” sort of laugh.
I don’t know.. I think Nat guilted him into taking it. She wasn’t wrong for being annoyed on my behalf that he was so unimpressed by our effort to say bye to him. But it made me feel more awkward that he felt like he had no choice but to take it.
Could have had cake at work on Monday. 

Anyway.
I went home and showered then went back to meet Nat to go to the leaving gathering.
I had no idea what to expect because it was so vague a description.
But it was okay.. not great because it was uncomfortable and it was work people and the constant sex topic was just weird and awkward.

So we mostly just sat quietly in the corner or meteoric corner of the rooms and watched/listened to the conversations.
Didn’t have a great amount of opportunity to talk directly to Carl but that’s okay. Less stupid things to say.

Then we walked most of the way to Nat’s home and went to bed. Well tried. Our new manager was face booking us for a little while because we are all weirdos.
Then home this morning.

And I felt really happy. I don’t know why.
It seems odd that I would be. But I found a great song that I feel should be my new motor for the year.

Huh?
Oh you want to hear it? Well okay let me just get you a link to youtube..

There we go.

Anyway I’ve gotta be up really early tomorrow.
Night x

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